2010's debut

It surprises me, how I haven't already posted an entry this year. It's been what... 4 days, since we all ushered in the new year, filled with diabolical hopes of "a better everything" without changing yesterday's habits. How typical.

Let's see, I can't complain so far. Been having pretty light-headed, happy days. Carefree too, I must say. Really do not regret my decision to wean myself off every kind of responsibility that you can imagine, for the past month and a half. With only the occasional deadline, been pretty much stuffing my face with sweets and treats of all sorts the rest of the time. Actually, that's not true. I like my snacks salty. Hurr.

So, i have a few questions and worries that I hope can be answered by the end of this year. I have issues that i hope can be resolved and bad habits that should be ideally abandoned... all by the end of this current year. It sounds ambitious.

Truth be told, I can't be bothered to shake off the bad habits. I like my pessimism. It makes me an exaggerated kind of realist. It keeps me on my toes, ready to pounce and say, "I BLOODY KNEW IT!!! YOU SUCK. IT SUCKS, IT ALL SUCKS. AND I SUCK".

Tragic.

So... QUESTIONS...

x Will i be falling in love this year? (HOPE NOT!)

x Will this be the year I actually lose 5 kg? (If i'm not too lazy)

x Will it all come together and make more sense to me?

x Will i be good this year? (HEHE)

x Will school mean something more to me?

x Will i finally just settle with the decisions I've made already??

Okay, fine... these questions barely scratch the surface of the others that I truly do want answered. Life's one never ending exam paper anyway and I don't want to bother answering all those questions in sequence. Am not a stickler for order. Shall skip my way through it, and just see it all unravel.

I can feel optimism starting to show... be careful, that's uncharted territory. Then again, it could be fun.

Theoretically speaking

When Farah and i get together to talk about stuff, we come up with such poignant sentiments, like;

A person in a relationship carries a big umbrella. For him, and his partner.
A single person carries a small umbrella. For his/her own use.
A single and lonely person....
carries no umbrella because he/she hopes that someone would share it with her.

The funny thing is that we'd laugh and laugh and laugh till our bellies hurt. But you know what or not, I can't put a finger on what's so funny about our observation up there. Come to think of it, you are right. IT IS SAD.

And what is it that we always laugh about, you ask? We don't even laugh at people. We poke fun and laugh at ourselves! Now that's unhealthy, right? Maybe our humour is just sick?

Friday night & all I felt like doing was to head on home. How's that eh?

Had a relatively good week. I got to see Yanni, spent quality time talking about everything. Then there was the senior citizen corner umbrella/lepak night with Farah... Then there's my colleagues! I finally decided that it was time to get to know the people behind Skype! Thank you for embracing me during lunchtime. I cannot be happier when the clock strikes 12 pm. Feels like recess time all over again :)

The thing is, it's so easy, getting to know new people, adding them on. It's keeping them close, that's just so hard.

Today, marks a year since Abdar and I parted ways (according to my blog archives). It's just so sad that I don't know him anymore. By the looks of it, I don't think he wants to know me. It's not that either of us need time to heal. It was more like time drove us apart, so far and so wide that it seems pointless even, to remain friends.

I think I'll go have a bath