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I think most of us spend an unforgivable amount of time, trying to evade what we're most afraid of. We make up excuses for them. We try to justify their reluctance and we do just about anything to convince ourselves that the way they've stopped reciprocating has got nothing to do with their loss of interest in us.

It's really not you, is it? It's her that you just don't want anymore. She knows. There. I've learnt that there is no point making up excuses for someone who doesn't even bother coming up with their own.

I wonder what'll happen if we all stopped over analysing and obsessing over every one of his gestures, or the tone of his voice. Why must we keep on guessing? It's his fault, not making his messages clear enough! Maybe he doesn't want it to be clear. Or maybe there isn't a message to decode, contrary to what you (and I) may like to believe.

I want to go out for a late night drive to the ends of the earth. Any takers? And this fever is dragging me down. I've just burned up my pillows. The parade was bearable, thankfully, despite the moody sun. Goodness, quit shining so bright, yes, you've made your point. You're HOT, so what? Hahaha I feel retarded, questioning the sun. Is the sun considered a living thing, anyway? Like trees? Do you happen to know? I'm curious.

G'night Lola dearest... Off you go to get all charged up for a long day out with me, starting Sunday morning!

Sent from my iPod, Lola Smokah

Inside my head

Let me throw out some random words and thoughts, just stuff off the top of my head.

- People don’t really know how awful I can be.
- Broccoli
- History
- Another bird got smashed on the road, on my way home today :(
- SEASEA (hahaha, this is the name of Nabiha’s SEAsian hist notes)
- Fuck
- Text me laaaaa…now?
- My boobs are not small okaaay
- Alex lied. He’s not gay no more. Alex suck.
- Ugly ugly uuuuuuuugggs
- Jurong’s MP died
- Why can’t they have Long John Silver’s around Bukit Batok area?
- I want sushi!
- Just hypothetically, if I have to choose between a fair girl and a dark girl (both look totally alike), which would I choose? (I really don’t know the answer to this one)
- Eeeeeeeeee fat thighs.
- Aiyaaa, I’m supposed to look up Jstor for Lit readings
- I wish I can take me far away on a boat trip to Milwake.
- How am I supposed to compete with all the other A’level candidates? HOOOOWWWWW??
- Why am I blogging uh? I thought I have lots to do? Er… like what?
- I wish I have a pet dog. A siberian husky would be hot.
- Come and get my number

There are lots more... Do you realise that within just a few seconds, your thoughts can really travel and bounce off one unrelated thing to another? I’ve obviously missed out on having a rational thought process. Does that make me kinda retarded? Or maybe… the fact that I'm consciously recording down my thoughts… made me feel obliged to think of a variety of "interesting" stuff. Huh. I don't really know what's the point of this entry.

Plus, I still have SEASEA readings to do. Prioritise, please!