Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
My proposal to the Almighty above.
I am so tired. I don't want to think anymore because nothing good ever comes out of it.
I want to switch off and slip into a year long coma. By then I reckon that I'd be thin enough to face the world too! Very good arrangement what. Win-win situation. If i slip into a coma, the insurance company will cover my medical expenses. Free accomodation! Free glucose drips! No mac! Thinner me! No brain activity! And possibly pretty flowers from family & friends at least during the first month. I don't want to die yet laaaa. This is a compromise. After that I promise i'll be a good girl and do all the desirable things that ought to be done and fulfil all my obligations, as a daughter, granddaughter, sister, niece, friend... yadayadayada blablablaaaaa. PLEAAAASE? I also don't want to turn nineteen because it's such an unlucky age, like thirteen. If 18 is already so painful and uncomfortable, when i was so damn sure it'll end up great... then i cannot fathom what 19 would be like. This is not an escape route. Just asking for time off only. And i blog too much. If i may ask, let me know the results of the US presidential elections first before sending me into a coma, can? And no accidents, please. I don't want a messy temporary "send off". I dont want people hassling my parents about harvesting my organs. A clean coma would suffice :)
Omg i realise that literature, more often than not discusses tragedy. That's the thing, isn't it. Life's most appreciated content can only be recognized through an unfortunate tragedy. Happiness is forgettable and always so goddamn fleeting. Tragedies are timeless classics.
I want to switch off and slip into a year long coma. By then I reckon that I'd be thin enough to face the world too! Very good arrangement what. Win-win situation. If i slip into a coma, the insurance company will cover my medical expenses. Free accomodation! Free glucose drips! No mac! Thinner me! No brain activity! And possibly pretty flowers from family & friends at least during the first month. I don't want to die yet laaaa. This is a compromise. After that I promise i'll be a good girl and do all the desirable things that ought to be done and fulfil all my obligations, as a daughter, granddaughter, sister, niece, friend... yadayadayada blablablaaaaa. PLEAAAASE? I also don't want to turn nineteen because it's such an unlucky age, like thirteen. If 18 is already so painful and uncomfortable, when i was so damn sure it'll end up great... then i cannot fathom what 19 would be like. This is not an escape route. Just asking for time off only. And i blog too much. If i may ask, let me know the results of the US presidential elections first before sending me into a coma, can? And no accidents, please. I don't want a messy temporary "send off". I dont want people hassling my parents about harvesting my organs. A clean coma would suffice :)
Omg i realise that literature, more often than not discusses tragedy. That's the thing, isn't it. Life's most appreciated content can only be recognized through an unfortunate tragedy. Happiness is forgettable and always so goddamn fleeting. Tragedies are timeless classics.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
*curses and swears
Damn it.
My pencil box's gooone (misplaced!)
NOW, of all the times it could have chosen to get itself misplaced.
Ohshuggs. It's so important okay.
& functional too.
And all my data's gone (my thumbdrive is in it).
And Farah, our anklet too.
"And my precious coloured pens" . Hahahahaha
PLUS, i've just realised it like... NOW. At bloody frikin' almost twelve midnight. I'm so sad. Now i think i know what combo hits mean. It sucks all hope and energy out of you. I hate how the teachers care so much about their students, about ME. It makes me feel guilty for not trying and caring more than them (or even half as much as them). Really though, i am so touched by their altruistic motives.
And now, i have nothing to write with. I need to wait for an eagle to lend me one of its feathers, and an octopus to squirt me some ink.
*exaggerates & dramatizes dramatically*
D:
My pencil box's gooone (misplaced!)
NOW, of all the times it could have chosen to get itself misplaced.
Ohshuggs. It's so important okay.
& functional too.
And all my data's gone (my thumbdrive is in it).
And Farah, our anklet too.
"And my precious coloured pens" . Hahahahaha
PLUS, i've just realised it like... NOW. At bloody frikin' almost twelve midnight. I'm so sad. Now i think i know what combo hits mean. It sucks all hope and energy out of you. I hate how the teachers care so much about their students, about ME. It makes me feel guilty for not trying and caring more than them (or even half as much as them). Really though, i am so touched by their altruistic motives.
And now, i have nothing to write with. I need to wait for an eagle to lend me one of its feathers, and an octopus to squirt me some ink.
*exaggerates & dramatizes dramatically*
D:
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